This blog has been a “dead blog.”
dead blog (n). def/ A blog that has a few posts before curling up and collecting Internet dust bytes.
Clearly, I am alive.
Sometimes we start things with the best intentions. I crafted this website and its blog with the intention attracting writing work. Problem: I’m horrible at self-promotion. I hate it. Give me a compliment and I can’t even look you in the eye. Ask me to describe my strengths? Instead I think of a hundred people who can do things better than me.
Excuses begin. Life gets in the way. You ask, “is this even worth writing?” Paying work takes priority, naturally. “Stuff” happens. You move. You move again. Out pops a baby. You try to juggle working and baby and life without losing yourself.
Not long after deciding to compete in the World Masters Rowing Regatta, I realized I needed to approach my personal life with the same mindset I brought to training. It was simple. The WRMR has a set deadline: September 2018. If I want to medal, what time do I need to row? I wrote that down. From there, I worked backwards. Each month has a priority, a target number of workouts each week, and a goal. There’s enough flexibility to adjust course when necessary, but the target remains the same.
Growing my personal goals takes the same ritualized approach. While I have to accept I cannot be or do everything perfectly, I can achieve my goals. They may take longer than I’d like, but by chipping away at one objective at a time, I can get there.
Early in the year I finally made time to write down all my personal goals. I paired these goals with the steps necessary to achieve them and the obstacles standing in my way. One step: “revamp my personal website.” Obstacle: I’m afraid of putting myself out there.
Maybe I can’t be a super-dedicated blogger writing eloquent posts about motherhood or athleticism. Screw the weekly or biweekly schedule. What I can do is make an effort to write when a topic inspires me. I can keep working to check off the Goals 2018 list. If no one reads it, who cares? It’s not about you, it’s about me.